Breaking away from the standard format of this blog, I'm going to be very real for a few moments with those reading this. Last week I was asked how I knew Jesus loved me. I gave a silly answer, but in reality a very truth-filled answer. My reply was "just look at me", I said with a smile. The group laughed and told me perhaps I needed help with my confidence. Funny thing happened this week, I began to really focus on that question... how do I know that Jesus loves ME?
I could give the "righteous" response and say because the Bible tells me so. It goes deeper than that, well at least it does for me. I've know that Christ has loved me from the time I was about 5 years old. Some may think that I really couldn't have understand the depths of God's love at that point...but I can honestly say today, that even at that early age, I knew without doubt that I was loved by a very big God and that I was safe in His care.
Without even knowing what seed she was planting, my Aunt who I adored (still do), took me to church on a Easter Sunday all dressed up...white gloves and all... for the special Easter program, I think it was primarly for the Easter Egg hunt that was going on that day. :) What she never knew and may still to this day not know, was that I found out about a Savior who died on a cross for me that day and I began praying His protection over my life and over my brothers eventually. I know that He heard each and everyone of those prayers from a little girl who didn't really know who He was, but He knew me.
Ask me how I know Jesus loves me?
When I was around 6 weeks old, the doctors told my very young mother that more than likely I wouldn't make it and if I did I'd never walk nor talk and would be mentally retarded. My brothers swear they got the last one right. I could share stories from my childhood that most would find hard to listen to, but God was listening. I had a "guidance counselor" in High School that called me into his office after hearing of my home life thinking that he'd see a girl walk in his door that was a total mess and instead found a very strong, intelligent, poised young lady who knew Jesus loved her. I could share how angels protected me that year in a car accident that could have turned deadly or later into adulthood how heartache and a close call to going home to be with Jesus occurred with the doctors informing my family that had I waited to seek help another 30 minutes I would have died. I could share all of that and some of you would sit and wonder how through all of that did I know Jesus loved me and my response would be, because He brought me through each moment with a purpose and a plan over my life.
He could have just allowed me home to be with Him as that small baby but He chose to leave me with my Mom and blessed me with an extended family that nurtured me and loved me so immensely. He could have allowed me to fall into the traps of life, blaming all around me for the hard times as a young girl and turning to the things of this world, but instead He placed incredible people in my life to set examples for me and to help me look beyond the pain and see the blessings. He could have allowed me to die 6 weeks before my son passed away, leaving my son to face his final days without his mother to hold him as he took his last breath on his own but God saved me to be there to rock my little man when his request was "Mommy, hold me". See that's how I know Jesus loves me... He could have never died on that cross, He could have allowed me to bare all of the hard times of life on my own and not given me the love of friends and family. He could have said that all my sins weren't worth the effort... but He didn't. He loved me and claimed me as HIS own and has been by my side each step of life through the good and the bad.
Some may be saying, well if He loved you so much why did He let you go through all of it? That's the interesting twist. He knew who I needed to be today to plant the very seed that my Aunt did all those years ago. I needed His heart to have a heart for others in pain and chaos. Today I thank Him for seeing me through and for teaching me His love, showing me His heart, so that I can share that with others.
Ask yourself today, How do I know Jesus loves me? You might find the answer deeper than you'd first respond.
Blessings,
Heather
